Love what you do - do what you love - volunteer for your passion

So, I volunteer a lot.  People who know me, know this is true.  Sometimes to the chagrin of my
husband and my children, no doubt.  But yeah, I volunteer for a couple of different organizations. 

PTA - not just at my kids' schools, where I was Treasurer for two years and then President for three years, but also at the next level.  I was Council President and now am Council Treasurer - the Council I'm in oversees 12 local schools and their PTAs.  I've been nominated to move up to the District, which oversees the entire San Fernando Valley.  I have resisted that move for a while now because I feel that the further I get from the local schools, the less impact my time will have on the kids - which is the whole reason to volunteer.

I also volunteer with Girl Scouts.  I have been a leader since 2011 when Nadia was in 2nd grade.  I have loved being a leader.  Sometimes, the parents are hard to deal with and sometimes the kids have serious attitudes, but overall, I truly believe in the Girl Scout mission to cultivate girls with courage, confidence, and character, now more than ever.  And with Girl Scouts, I have moved up the ranks too - troop leader (which I still am), to Service Unit product sales support, to Service Unit Manager.  I oversee about 40-45 troops in our local area.  It can be an exhausting position, but everytime we have a troop leader meeting (once a month all the leaders get together to get info and exchange ideas), I walk away feeling really good about the support I am giving to our local leaders (along with my Service Unit Management Team).  That support flows directly to supporting the girls in those troops - leaders who are happy and feel supported translate to fun and active troops.

I volunteer because I feel passionately about these two organizations.  But I'm still waiting for the cash to start rolling in.

Say, what?

Well, there is all this advice out there about doing what you love and feel passionate about and the success/money will come.  I'm following that - I love supporting kids and other adults who support kids (like teachers and troop leaders).  I've been doing this since 2008.  And every year it seems to get more and more time consuming.  But I have yet to see any kind of monetary payout.

Are you sure about that?

Yeah, yeah, I know that the skills I use in volunteering, like event planning, human resources, time management, and project management can translate into a career and money.  Ok, fine, I'll stop waiting for the money to start falling from the sky!


All kidding aside and getting back to passions...one of the reasons I volunteer is because I have a passion for fun.  And I volunteer with some seriously funny people!  Some of these people have become true friends and sisters in the cause.   People who I just adore and LOVE to hang out with them.  I also have a passion for kids, which is how I chose the organizations I support.  And I have a passion for making a difference.  After all, if not me, then who?

But a lot of people don't realize that when the fun stops, when the support doesn't get to the intended audience, then the reason for volunteering stops.  Who is going to give their free time to something that isn't giving them SOMETHING back (not money).  Giving them a purpose, giving them a sense of satisfaction, giving them some fun!

Volunteering can be serious work.  I always hated when someone said they would do something and then bailed.  Just because it's a volunteer thing doesn't mean that someone isn't relying on you doing what you said you were going to do!  Because if you say you're going to do something, say run a table at the carnival, and then you back out or even worse, don't show up, then someone else has to scramble to fill your position with another volunteer.  So, while it can (and should!) be fun, it's also something to consider carefully.  Don't just say yes without every intention to do your best.

Because what is just fun for you may just be a passion for someone else.

Goodbye 16, Hello 17

Tuesday night, I cuddled on the couch with Damian in the last waning hours of his 16th year.  During his middle school years, cuddling went out of style.  But in the last year, the affection between us came back and how we hug a lot more, talk a lot more, I try to just *listen* more (though it is very hard to not always give advice).

On Monday, he talked to me about having trouble lately with feeling as though he is passing for a boy.  I look at the changes he's gone through and I cannot understand anyone who looks at him for the first time now and assumes Damian is a girl.  I get it if you knew him from before, if you knew him as Maya.  That's a hard habit to break and we understand (but so appreciate it if you try your best to get it right).  But meeting him for the first time, being introduced to him as Damian - I don't get it.  But it happens still and it really hurts him when it does.  It happened in one of his classes that day - and it was a teacher who had never had him before, so there shouldn't be this issue (his name is changed in the school already).  And I didn't have any advice other than to just keep correcting people.  Yeah, it's totally lame advice.  And what a terrible burden to put on a kid.  Especially by an adult.  All of Damian's friends get it and do not have a problem.  They have switched over and, to the best of my knowledge, none of them have made glaring mistakes.

But even this past weekend, it happened AGAIN at his Saturday morning Art Conservatory classes.  The school apparently pre-prints the rosters for the entire year for each session (they change teachers every 4-6 weeks).  And since they were printed back in September, it was before we talked to them about the name change.  Still, they should have just gone in and changed the name manually after we talked to them.  But they didn't and EVERY TIME Damian gets a new teacher, he has to go to each of them to change the name again and basically come out to each of them all over again.  It's frustrating.  It's annoying.  It's emotional for him and it's infuriating for me that he has to go through this over and over again. 

Anyway, so we talked about it - well, Damian talked and I listened.  I just said that I'm sorry it keeps happening.  But the most wonderful thing happened after that - Damian said that he likes talking to me and feels better after we talk.

Best. Compliment. Ever.

What parent doesn't want to hear that?! I just walked over to him and hugged him.  Our relationship has really come a long way since when he was in 9th grade and we fought every day.  And I mean EVERY DAMN DAY. But now, I feel as though we are closer than ever.  I'm seeing the talkative, fun-loving, wickedly sarcastic and smart person he was always on the inside.

He's 17 years old now.  And this year was the first year he was a birthday BOY.  Wow, I just love this kid.

Happy birthday, Damian!!